Rise up this mornin’
Smiled with the risin’ sun
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin’ sweet songs
The first three months of a clinical trial over and I am so very grateful that other than some inflammatory response resulting in some very painful joint and muscle pain at times and a few days of sickness and diarrhoea I have been healthy and managed to remain positive throughout (even if I may have looked pretty dreadful at times). I have actually only felt ill for a fraction of these three months.
No musings on the past today, my thoughts at the moment have turned to the present and indeed the future with this milestone in my treatment journey.
Living with Chronic lymphocytic leukemia doesn’t mean that I step back and take it easy, no it means that I need to step up a gear, there is a lot to achieve, many plans and ideas to see through. And I am fortunate to have built a strong foundation to build on.
It does mean that I should spend time looking after myself though. By that I don’t mean focusing on the ‘work/life balance’ whatever that strange and over-used term means.
I am truly fortunate to work in an industry that I love and throw myself into all sorts of projects that I get a huge amount of fulfilment and job satisfaction out of. There are of course ups and downs and occasionally I cross paths with people who are simply in the business for selfish career progressive reasons as much as they pretend to care for what they do.
In my humble opinion these are truly the worst sort of people who would sell their gran to climb that next rung of the ladder. These people are the only ones who ever cause me to lose focus and become disillusioned. People who are best avoided where possible.
I am not saying that there is anything wrong with wanting to achieve, to be successful. It’s just the approach that some people take, spending much of their time on putting other people down rather than focusing on making themselves better at what they do.
On the whole I can say that I don’t really feel that I have ‘worked’ a day in my life (as most people would describe work) The many changes in direction and constantly welcoming change, and the huge variety of projects certainly help.
Its so very true that I have not, in the past, taken proper care of myself particularly in the area of getting enough sleep (I recently read ‘Why We Sleep’ by Matthew Walker which is a fascinating look at the effects of not sleeping enough and of not getting the ‘right’ type of sleep). I am guilty as charged.
I work in an industry that is notorious for long working hours and for example I once did a 60 hour shift to ensure a show opened in time. This is an extreme example but regular 15 hour days seven days a week were, and sometimes are still fairly normal.
Fortunately European working time directives forced the industry to take a long hard look at working practices and generally the industry has got much better. We can only hope that recent events don’t allow this to reverse direction.
I have always exercised regularly and eaten relatively healthily. Although I have a ‘sweet tooth’ stemming from poor childhood choices. For example when out for a meal I will choose my main course after deciding what desert I fancy.
I put my ongoing good health down to the ‘accidental preparation’ for this medical adventure during the past few years. Regular exercise, healthy diet and a positive attitude and gratitude for everything I have and have achieved.
Having completed these three months I am now in maintenance!
I recently discovered that ‘maintenance’ is effectively carrying on treatment now we have reached a pinnacle to the dose of medication I am taking. I have been looking forward to getting back into the gym but it looks like the high risk of internal bleeding and bruising will continue to be a possibility so this may not be a good idea just now.
So I am looking forward to getting back into Yoga and running (although fast walking maybe more of an accurate description) as a first step and then lets see what happens. I am also thinking of getting a bike!
‘Work’ wise we have some really interesting projects on the go and I have had a lot of time to dream up weird and wonderful ideas. Watch this space….
See you soon, take care, be kind…